April 28 07
My mind has too much to say, to much to regret about
too much to smile about, too much to laugh like a mad person
I think too much, it make things good many times
it make things bad.....many times,
its not my mind.. its me who make things difficult for me
because i like challenges...i also get involved....
But i know my caliber....my strength
i win most, but i loose few....
i always regret...for things....
boys are not suppose to cry...but i cried...
so what....even strong boys cry......i m strong...
i cried not at home, but during my studies, in library, in those silent rooms,
where u r free to do anything in there.....
i never wanna hurt anyone.....but at times i do mistakes...i knw not every mistakes are suppose to be forgiven so easily.. they have punishments....i am ready for those...because i know someday they will forgive me and start liking and loving me again as they used to do earlier...
My memories from the past haunts me, but still i have to live with them.... they at times shatter me from inside...but then at the other point they scream at me...that how can you let this memory shatter you....come on be brave be strong... if you continue losing like this you will never win...and your life is a waste...end it...its of no use......
i tried it once......but then i realized myself...who i am.....i not just any person... I am Sachin... i am not the one who is ready to lost in the crowd... i am the one who is ready to be in the crowd and shine among them... i am not weak....i am strong....its my life....i have to do something good...if not for me..then for the others....that was the day i realized myself...and till date i am living for myself and for others too.. i always made people smile laugh tried to give them those moments that i missed...a feeling of a caring and trusting friend.....someone's younger brother someone's elder brother....someone's best friend, someone's secret keeper...i have many unknown things ane memories that no one knows....but whatever I do no matter how happy i keep them...people are selfish and cunning...no matter how many sacrifices i did to make them happy....many of them betrayed me...once there meaning is over...what are they trying to show...that the people around me are like this.....i admit I made mistakes at times in choosing friends..but i cant change my thinking for others......because of some morons... and they know how much these people hurt me...but i still keep on smiling... they know how sad I am how much they hurt me.. but i always keep on smiling.........and they never asked me why i am doing this........because they know y keeping others happy i can remain satisfied and happy and cool.......they also made me think that i loved the wrong person.....i once considered their views...but then i realized what i did....i am sorry for that.......i made her cry i made her sad i made her...........i knw what was the truth that time....but the evil power is too strong and it overshadowed my ......and i made mistakes after that............but i am sorry for that.............
i am ready for any punishment.......i always keep on saying within me...please come back......
just come back............
